The In Between Man

Part of my Divine Hours reading this morning was Psalm One (I think I’m a week off the book’s schedule, but that’s another matter). I wanted to focus on the first two verses this morning:

Blessed is the man
who walks not in the counsel of the wicked,
nor stands in the way of sinners,
nor sits in the seat of scoffers;
but his delight is in the law of the LORD,
and on his law he meditates day and night.

There could not have been a better passage for me to read this morning. I have been sensing lately that I have become a kind of “in between” man. The in between man does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, he doesn’t do a whole lot of scoffing, but he does tip toe occasionally into the way of the sinners. Though he is not allied with sinners, he certainly does not go out of his way to remove himself from their company. This means that he has not delighted in the law of the Lord and is not given to much meditation on the Lord or his law. He is not given fully to one side of the other, is open to both of their influences, and therefore isn’t quite in the full blessing, but is not too far away from it.

This Psalm is indicative of the direction that I want to go in. While I still want to post on weighty theological issues, I will redirect some of that to my more theologically thick blog (link). I still want to address theology here and believe that we essentially do theology all of the time, but I feel like I have gotten a bit caught up in “thinking” through theology and defining terms. Now that I have wrestled with some terms and categories and overall “policies,” I feel like it’s time to start living them out more.

The solution does not rest in merely reading the Bible more, though that is part of it. I also feel like I need to be reading more books on Christian living, theology, and prayer. My new meditation times are also a key. My goal for Lent is a half hour of meditation each day. This is all part of moving into the blessing of God and becoming a man who delights in him, while ignoring the paths of sinners.

And so my content here will do a bit of a shift. Nothing drastic. Just moving more toward the devotional`and providing more Bible study observations. I’ll still bring up inane topics, write about life, gush about our crazy rabbits (who just gnawed through their morning carrots!), and drop the occasional bad pun.

It has been over a year since I finished my course work for my MDiv, and a little under a year since I walked off the stage with my diploma. I went through a weird year of detox/post-seminary confusion. I didn’t really want to study the Bible like I did at seminary. I didn’t want to haul out the Greek and Hebrew, read a book cover to cover, or spend serious time reading tough articles. I still read deep, academic stuff, but I just peck around with it. A chapter here, a chapter there. My Greek and Hebrew are weak. And I don’t even know where to find good articles.

So there you have it. More Bible, more prayer, more study. I hope that this will equal a better blog. My days of whining about how sucky the church is are hopefully over. Rants will happen I’m sure, but I think it’s time to move away from what I am not, what I must leave. I have also tired of defining the emerging church and just what it is that I think God is doing. I feel like I have a grip on my categories, now it’s time to live. Perhaps this only means that I think differently. God may still keep me on the shelf. But my suspicion is that stepping away from my “deconstructing/reconstructing” and into a “being/going” mentality will make it much easier on God to point me in the right direction.

I view the past few years as a long time out, a reorienting. I’m ready to go somewhere now, even if it means I have to sit around some more, that’s alright. I think that God is beginning to cultivate some values and practices in me that will help me be of use to him.

If you see me jumping into the abstract, theoretical realm too much, please don’t hesitate to wack me with the comment stick. That’s part of the reason why it’s there: accountability. I hope to press in closer to God and step away from my obsessive theologizing. I hope that will translate into better theology, a better life, and more encouraging blog.

And as a side note, I’m thrilled to see that Josh is posting. That will only make this site more encouraging and beneficial to its readers. Josh provides a fresh perspective that has been sorely needed here. He also brings information about Mate, the nectar of the gods.

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