Apr 29, 2009
Anger Doesn’t Make Anything Better
I’ve been angry lately.
It’s a mix of frustration and a sense of being mistreated. It’s not the end of the world. However, every time I think of a particular situation, I get so hopping mad, I can feel the anger absorbing me, taking control of my emotions in a powerful way.
I’d like to think out loud with you as I’m processing things…
We’re all full of something. When I sense anger filling me in this way, I become deeply disturbed. Anger tells me it will only pass if I give in, succumbing to its powerful presence. The problem is that scripture tells us to be full of love and the Holy Spirit. Fulfillment will not arrive through obedience to our emotions. This is a situation in which supposed liberty to do what we desire is actually a miserable slavery to our own appetites—including our appetites to defend ourselves.
Anger is rooted in the demand for a right. A pastor once shared this truth in a sermon on meekness. The gist is, every time we feel wronged, it’s because we have a picture of how we should be treated and that self-made standard hasn’t been met. Anger is the result.
God calls us to look beyond ourselves. Even if we have been wronged, God calls his people to love one another AND our enemies. So whoever we target with our anger needs our compassion and prayers. Who knows why people act the way they do, but keep in mind that even some of the most hardened criminals cooped up in our prisons started out as victims themselves. The pain they pass on is the only legacy they have to share.
Stop the cycle of hurt with blessing. Sometimes I think it totally sucks that we’re responsible for ending the cycle of hurt and cursing with blessing, but in reality it’s the only way out of this dark place of anger and pain. Giving in to the anger only drags us down and ensures that everyone loses. Ignoring it and feigning indifference doesn’t address the core matters of personal rights, our own pain, and the pain of our offenders.
However, responding to anger with prayer, blessing, and dare I suggest love requires us to admit it isn’t all about us, we’re not the only ones with issues, and our only true standing that matters is our place before God. It’s one thing to say, “I want to seek first God’s Kingdom” or “I only care about what God thinks of me,” but such theology takes up power when we meet cursing with blessing.
We have shown the world that self cannot rule. Living under the delusion that one’s self is most important makes for a life of misery because no one will treat you the way you think you deserve. Once we realize that we deserve nothing, but have been loved by God all along simply on the basis of divine grace, we can take our first faltering steps away from anger into the glorious peace of God’s love and acceptance. It’s a difficult process, but it’s our only hope.
