:: in.a.mirror.dimly ::

I’ve read about Paul boasting of weaknesses, but it has become increasingly clear to me that everything we count as a weakness or past failure is an opportunity for God to not only heal us, but for us to share that healing with others. We boast about our weaknesses because they remind us of our need for God and the power of God in our lives.

No matter how hard I try to forget it, God has a way of bringing up our insufficiencies, while overwhelming us with his love and sufficiency. I experienced this directly over the weekend.

While speaking at a church I mentioned some of my struggles with fear and anxiety. It kicks in at predictable moments, but on other occasions I become keyed up and nervous without necessarily realizing what has caused it.

To make a long story short, my family prayed for me, God’s Spirit filled the room and all of us, and I sensed that God’s Kingdom was advancing into that area of my life, breaking the power of fear. The verse, “God has not given us a spirit of fear (or timidity)” came to mind, a constant reminder of God’s power and the simple fact that he does not want us to live in fear. He gives us a Spirit of confidence, a Spirit that makes us God’s sons and daughters.

And so after the service someone mentioned having similar struggles with fear and anxiety. I know the feelings all too well: the tension in the chest and the shortness of breath. I felt deeply burdened to pray, so Julie, myself, and a few others prayed for this person. Once again, God’s Spirit showed up powerfully.

In reality, I had nothing much to offer this person. However, since God’s Spirit brought healing into my life, I have a gift I can freely share with others. As I celebrate my weakness and inability to overcome anxiety and fear on my own, I can celebrate the power of God and freely pass it on to others.