Feb 10, 2012
The Women in Ministry Series: Fertile Ground for Ministry
Today’s guest blogger, Cortney Dale, is currently exploring ordination in the Episcopal Church. I’ve been looking forward to sharing her story with you for months because Cortney A) has a great story and B) uses puns on her blog:
I’ve inherited a few anxieties. My mother once advised me in all seriousness to never let a man see me without makeup until our wedding night. It’s a hyperbole of her good-intentioned parenting style that she learned from her mother. Act nice and fit in. And so I did.
It wasn’t quite fertile ground for hearing a call to ministry, let alone ordained, collar-wearing, pulpit preaching, Eucharist-celebrating ministry. Let me mention that I come from a tradition (Episcopal) that began ordaining women a few years before I was born. The itch was there, but the hesitancy came from my end, not my church’s.
Which is all to say that this bright young girl grew up with some loathsome self-doubt. What would the people of my small conservative hometown think? Was I loud enough, tall enough, assertive enough to be taken seriously? Who was I to think I had something to offer people?
God bless the day I decided that being authentic was more important than being liked.
God bless the day I prioritized God’s call over any of the “roles” thrown at me from various corners of culture.
Funny enough, for all the confidence I thought a priest needed, the altar is the most humbling place to be in church. I stood there every Sunday for the past six months for a discernment internship, pointing the book (helping the priest keep track of the service- think human bookmark), and looking out at a sea of faces that had gotten dressed pretty on their day off to come here and meet Jesus.
Here. To meet Jesus. What I have to offer is irrelevant because all people need was offered two thousand years ago.
In the real trenches of day-to-day ministry, an ounce of grace is worth a pound of gumption. I’ve almost come to treasure my inherited anxieties as a little reminder that I’ll always be dependent on God’s perfectly timed gifts of grace. Almost.
My life, for one, would be a lot easier if God never called women into ministry. Alas, here I sit- drawn to church, drawn to the altar, drawn to serve and still with a uterus. Yet I’m beginning to suspect, after meeting incredible women who’ve faithfully answered a call, after reading their blogs and hearing them preach and listening to their stories, God doesn’t call us to ministry despite the fact we’re women, but because of it.
About Today’s Blogger
Cortney Dale is in the discernment process for ordination in the Episcopal Church. In her spare time she’s an undisciplined blogger at cortneydale.wordpress.com. She lives in Bowling Green, Kentucky. [Read the rest of her bio complete with one-liners and puns HERE.]
About the Women in Ministry Series
The Women in Ministry Series is a collection of guest posts that aims to:
- Provide an alternative to the women in ministry debates by telling the stories of women in ministry.
- Encourage women to explore their God-given callings.
You can stay updated on the latest post each week by signing up for the weekly e-mail list. (You also get a free E-book!)
Comment Policy: Everyone is welcome to leave a comment. However, this series takes for granted that women are called by God into every facet of ministry. This is not the place to debate that point and such comments will be removed. Women have been told “no” in far too many places. This is one place that is committed to saying “yes.” For more about the comment policy or submitting your own story, read here.
Next Week’s Blogger: Addie Zierman
Thanks for sharing this story, Cortney. I’m glad to see you stepping into your calling.
Do you have any thoughts on how you serve in ministry differently than male ministers? What aspect of womanhood do you bring to your ministry?
I think it’s important that we celebrate the beauty of differences in male and female leaders in the church. I figured it would best be heard coming from someone in the middle of it!
Hi, Tony-
Good questions! As far as differently than a male minister, I probably smile more and never pass a chance to cuddle a baby.
I think I would expand the differences of male and female leaders, to simply be the differences between all God’s children. Of course there seems to be a gravitational pull for certain feminine and masculine qualities, but I try not to limit myself or others based on those.
Does that make sense?
-Cortney
I totally hear you about not limiting yourself. I’m not one to make specific definitions for ALL of masculinity or femininity.
However, I see as part of this healing process a look into the differences in male and female ministry. With a male-dominiated leadership model (in church and society), a certain culture has been created in the realm of leadership. So instead of women stepping into leadership roles as themselves, you see them take on more masculine qualities in an attempt to fit in or be respected.
What I think will bring healing is celebrating the differences that women bring. I’m not interested in seeing women leaders trying to act like men (i.e. less smiles, less baby cuddling, less compassionate, lowered voices, business suit, etc). At least if that’s not them truly being themselves.
I just want to see women celebrated and men to see the value of what women bring to the body of Christ. And not just their prayer ministry and keeping the church clean, if you know what I mean!
Ok- I see what you mean now.
I’ve heard stories of the first wave of female Episcopal priests in the early 80′s who really had to make an effort to masculinize themselves to be taken seriously- voice coach to lower their voice, never wear skirts, and all. Now I could introduce you to a few priests who are the girliest of girls.
I think it’s a change that can only come about slowly, but surely, and on a grassroots level. And by both men and women who faithfully answer *whatever* God calls them to.
Good thoughts Tony and great reply Cortney. It’s so helpful to remember that many churches simply don’t know what it looks like for a woman to minister.
Courtney, what a lovely post. I think these lines say it all:
“God bless the day I decided that being authentic was more important than being liked.
God bless the day I prioritized God’s call over any of the “roles” thrown at me from various corners of culture.”
I pray as you start off on this journey God gives you the grace to keep those two things in mind. What a great place from which to launch your ministry.
Thanks, Jessica, and thanks for the prayers- very appreciated!
“What I have to offer is irrelevant because all people need was offered two thousand years ago.” Instant fan. Thanks for this glimpse into the humility of the pulpit.
Thanks, Tamara! The fandom is mutual.
Glad you’re a fan Tamara. I ran into Cortney a few months ago and after reading a little of her blog and her story, I knew she needed to be a part of this series. And gosh, I can’t resist a good pun!
Such a beautiful story! May God bless you Cortney!
Thanks, Julie!
I think this is good s— Cortney Dale from Kentucky. I think there are deeper answers to the first question posed by Tony about differences that you bring to the table as Cortney and you as a woman.
I also think your writing is good and impressive and reminds me of the wit of Tina Fey. Are you a fan?
Yes, Julie is right. God bless you and what you do.
Bungee, you’ve clearly read my autobiography.
Awesome to hear your story, Cortney, and the way you tell it so humbly makes me hope and pray you will bless a congregation someday as a priest! My sister is also going through the discernment process through her Episcopal church
Thanks, Stephanie- where is your sister?
Pennsylvania just outside of Philly. She goes to a great and supportive Episcopal church. I will send her this link!
Love this story Cortney!! I love “God doesn’t call us to ministry despite the fact we’re women, but because of it”…it’s like you read my mind.
Thanks- it’s great to realize we’re meant to be here as much as anyone else.
I’d requote some of my favorite lines here, but others are snatching them up quickly.
But here’s one not yet taken:
“I’ll always be dependent on God’s perfectly timed gifts of grace”
Oh my! I am teaching a teen girls’ class on Sunday and this is my very topic. Just one more evidence of the truth of the statement.
Your last line, however, probably speaks the loudest to me:
“God doesn’t call us to ministry despite the fact we’re women, but because of it.”
Amen. May the Lord continue to use your womanhood to His Glory and for the good of those you will serve in His name.
Thanks Lisa for dropping by. Your comment ties back to Tony’s comment about celebrating the particular qualities that women bring to ministry.
Okay. How did I not read this until today? Yay Courtney!
1. I want to be your new best friend because
2. You used the word uterus in a public post about Jesus and the world did not stop spinning (I think).
3. You are honest and real and women need to hear that. Heck, MEN need to hear that.
4. The Church at large would do well to borrow an ounce of your pulpit anxiety. Indeed what have we to offer the One who made us? Nothing but who you are, woman, and you are fantastic. So nice to meet you.
5. Thanks, Ed for letting us meet Courtney.
Gosh Jen, you must have been like running, feeding your family, and doing work or something like that.
I’m so glad Cortney’s story meant so much to you. It really connected with me. When I said that I’ve been looking forward to her story for a while, I mean since last fall when I first thought of this series.